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Narcissists are known for their excessive self-love and grandiosity and their reckless behavior to attract attention and approval at the expense of others. In their eyes, their worth is determined in comparison to others, and they become sullen and vengeful when starved of a much needed narcissistic supply. These 10 songs illustrate the nuances of narcissists’ behavior, beliefs, and motivations, sometimes uncannily accurate.

“Blank Space” by Taylor Swift

In this 2014 hit song by Taylor Swift, she describes love as a game and a new conquest as her next mistake which she can “read like a magazine.” She can show him incredible things, “Magic, madness, heaven, sin,” and promises that the high will be worth the pain.

She’s got a long list of ex-lovers too, who’ll tell him that she’s insane, but she will still show him incredible things and be that girl for a month. As a “rose garden filled with thorns” and a “nightmare dressed like a daydream,” he will be addicted and always return despite her insane jealousy. After all, “taking it way too far” is one of the hallmarks of a narcissist…

“I’m too Sexy” by Right Said Fred

According to Right Said Fred, he is too sexy for his love, his clothes, Milan, his car, and a disco party.

Although he acknowledges that his love is going to leave him, it is of little concern and consequence as there are always more fans lined up.

“Applause” by Lady Gaga

I live for the applause, applause, applause.” This is a typical narcissistic craving. For a narcissist, his own value and self-worth are determined and reflected by the opinion and recognition of others. Without explicit and overt gestures of admiration, he is lost in uncertainty and self-doubt.

Cheers and screams – “make it real loud” – feed the narcissistic supply and confirms his sense of grandiosity and entitlement.

“Can’t be Tamed” by Miley Cyrus

I can get a bit crazy, have to get my way, 24 hours a day.” Definitely narcissistic, right? Narcissists have to have their egos stroked, and their demands met continuously. Otherwise, they quickly start to feel starved for attention, which often causes even more outlandish and extreme behavior. Attention – good or bad – is what they measure their worth with.

“They try to change me, but they realize they can’t.” Attempting to change a narcissist is a futile endeavor. Depending on their emotion regulation and impulse control skills, which are typically not good, they might fool you for a while. But, their old habits is bound to return sooner rather than later.

“You’re so Vain” by Carly Simon

In this 1983 song by Carly Simon, the protagonist promised commitment, but it turned out only to be true as long as his partner indulged him and helped his image.

Talking about Lear jets and race horses, the narcissist will try anything within (and above his means) to reflect and uphold high status. And they cheat and exaggerate their way through life…

“Can’t Tell Me Nothing” by Kanye West

A narcissist is recognized by his reckless behavior aimed at being the center of attention. They see the world as a drama and others as supporting players. They don’t readily follow rules, and when they come across resistance, they don’t apologize but blame others for their behavior.

They often act extremely selfishly and don’t understand complaints about it because it’s their right to do so. They certainly don’t like being told what to do.

“If I Wanted to” Melissa Etheridge

According to Melissa Etheridge, she can do anything she puts her mind to, including “dance with the devil,” “never grow old,” and “have political leaders in the palm of my hand.” Typical narcissist-speak, they believe they can do everything, be anything, and that no one can outperform them.

What they steadfastly ignore, is that there is a rude awakening behind every corner. But, they are good at denial and excuses too, and usually blame their failures on external factors.

“This is How We Do It” by Katy Perry

For many narcissists, life’s a party, all day, all night, every day. It’s all neon and hazy, Champagne and Chanel, Maserati and club valets. The flashier the brand, the better.

When the party stops, the narcissist whines and sulks, until they have the next prey in their sight. They are demanding and tiresome, as their needs come first, and everybody has to fall in line or suffer the consequences.

“So What” by Pink

I guess I just lost my husband, so I’m gonna drink, I got a brand new attitude, I wanna get into trouble.” These few words perfectly describe the typical narcissist’s ability to get right back up after trouble. They bounce back without hesitation, and, indeed, without a second thought about their loss.

I’m still a rock star, and I don’t need you.” Their motto is to shrug off failure and resistance, blaming it on the other person’s inability to understand them. They just quickly move on, having forgotten and ignoring the other person’s unhappiness.

“Oh, Lord, it’s Hard to be Humble” by Mac Davis

This 1980 country hit song by Mac Davis is probably the pinnacle of narcissistic sentiments. “Oh Lord, it’s hard to be humble, When you’re perfect in every way, I can’t wait to look in the mirror, Cause I get better lookin’ each day, To know me is to love me…” It is hard to argue that this is the epitome of self-love, with which his girlfriend can’t compete!

For the narcissist, everything is a competition that they have to win and get all the accolades. If it works out otherwise, they find it unbelievable, that they were done in, and treated unfairly. It is definitely not their fault as they are perfect and deserving!

So, next time you get an inkling that you may be dealing with a narcissist, don’t get too involved, play their game if you have the time and patience, and stay aloof and objective. They wear their needs on their sleeve, so they are actually easy to understand and influence.

 

Joan Swart, PsyD

Joan Swart, PsyD

Forensic Psychologist | Business Developer at Open Forest LLC
Joan is a forensic psychologist, lecturer, and author of “Treating Adolescents with Family-Based Mindfulness” published by Springer in 2015 and “Homicide: A Forensic Psychology Casebook” published by CRC Press in 2016. She is a business developer at Open Forest LLC. Open Forest LLC provides online psychoeducation and self-help programs aimed at improving many conditions, including depression, anxiety, ADHD, and mindfulness.
Joan Swart, PsyD

@ForensicPsychDr

Forensic psychologist, #narcissist, #psychopath, other PDs | Business developer at https://t.co/KDl12htq5n | #pug lover | masters #powerlifting
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Joan Swart, PsyD
Joan Swart, PsyD

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